Welcome to the newest wing of the Hockey Hall of Shame. For decades, Hollywood has churned out its fair share of sports movies, and there have been so many classics it’s nearly impossible to narrow them down to just a Top Ten list. You’ve got Pride of the Yankees, The Basketball Diaries, Any Given Sunday, Field of Dreams, Rocky, Bang the Drum Slowly, Raging Bull, A League of Their Own, Moneyball, Caddyshack, The Natural, Ali, Bull Durham, Hoosiers, the list seems endless. Hockey has also been represented in Hollywood, but the results have been pretty hit-or-miss. On one hand, you’ve got the bench-mark for all hockey movies, the ridiculously funny Slap Shot, and the more-recent hit Goon. You’ve also got some solid historical films like Miracle, not to mention a few underrated hockey pics like Mystery, Alaska, and Youngblood. These movies were obviously made by people who knew the game, even lived and breathed it. In every frame of these movies, you could see that everyone involved in the movie truly loved the game. Then you’ve got tripe films like H-E-Double Hockey Sticks, National Lampoon’s Pucked, and the must maligned Slap Shot 3 which were created by hack writers and cynical directors who thought they could take the easy way out by loading their movies with cliches and incredibly dumb sports humour.
Well now, these Hockeywood Disasterpieces will finally get their due and be skewered for your reading pleasure. Sit back, relax, grab a beer, and prepare to dig deep into the realm of insultingly stupid hockey tales that once clogged up the straight-to-DVD section of your now-abandoned Blockbuster Video.
Like watching hockey where the rules are made up as you go along? Like watching monkeys struggle to skate? Like seeing 12,679 cliches and stereotypes all rammed into 93 minutes of celluloid that would make even a 4-year-old say, “this is too much”? Ever wonder what it would be like if Forrest Gump had a long-lost slow-witted cousin? You are going to LOVE this movie!